Charlie Brown’s Balls

And by that, I mean footballs, obviously. What did you think I was getting at?

People sometimes wonder why Chuck keeps kicking at that ball, even though he knows in his heart that Lucy is going to yank it away and he’s going to end up on his ass again. Honestly, I’m surprised that boy doesn’t have brain damage. Or maybe he does.

Anyway. The reason is simple.

He has to. If he stopped, if he actually considered that regardless of how many times she may promise otherwise, regardless of the timing or situation, and completely unrelated to Chuck’s state of mental health – ironic, given Lucy’s moonlighting as a psychologist – she will never hold the ball for him, he would kill himself. Because there is nothing else for him. He can count on nothing. He can change nothing. The best he can do is hope, and his only real hope is that one shining day, Lucy will stay put.

Yes. I think Charlie Brown would commit suicide if he actually admitted to himself that Lucy is going to screw him over every time. Because Lucy is really his only lifeline.

Snoopy doesn’t care; he’s off being a writer, hanging with a bird, or dogfighting in WWII. (Side note: has it ever officially been stated that Snoopy is Charlie’s dog? Like straight up? Or is the dog just kinda “there” and we assume it’s his because of proximity?) Linus is only there because of Sally. Sally’s blood, so has to be around, but obviously doesn’t care much for her bro. Schoeder is oblivious to the universe; he’s there because he lives nearby. Pigpen is brought in by the other kids so they have someone to mock. Peppermint Patti and Marcy are there because Patti needs recruits for her softball team and Marcy goes with the package… Her seeming crush on Chuck is just her cover (and he’s the ideal candidate, as he’s too weak and self-loathing to do anything about it). I’m not sure Woodstock knows Charlie is anything other than an extremely mobile statue that magically produces food on occasion.

Lucy’s the only one who really acknowledges Charlie Brown, who seems aware of him on any legitimate level, and seems to associate with him for reasons that aren’t purely selfish or coincidental. But she also is his greatest threat, just because she’s that close. She can almost make him think he matters. But pulls the football away (or goes to stare at Schoeder, or finds treating Pigpen’s self-esteem issues to be more important than seeing what Chuck’s up to that day) every single time. But that’s okay, because he’s convinced that one day, any day now, she’ll be there for him.

If he admitted the truth… It’d kill him.

How do I know?

Because I’m out of football holders.


3 responses to “Charlie Brown’s Balls

  1. Awwww (hugs) Charlie Brown was always one of my faves, I wanted so much for him to kick that ball… every single time.

    • Being how I am, I always wanted him to kick Lucy in the face instead, but that probably wouldn’t fly these days… I was also fond of Eddie Dean’s thoughts on the subject in King’s Dark Tower series; namely, that Lucy should sporadically hold the ball, just to drive Chuck bonkers.

      • It would have been really funny if she had gotten kicked, even in the hand. LOL At least if she held it sometimes he would have reason for his hopes.

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